“Urm, Elikem, come and look at this! It looks like the positive one on the box!” I laughed as I shouted from the bathroom. “What?! Really??” We both stared at the little stick and then the box, the little stick and then the box. The two blurry lines became clearer and clearer into focus: two solid lines, just like the the picture on the box. Joy erupted in our bathroom as we both laughed and hugged, our wide eyes becoming tear filled with delight. Love bubbled up and overflowed as we gazed at each other in wonder. Elikem told me how much he loved me and how beautiful I am to him. I told him I felt like the luckiest girl in the world, and that I know he will be the best daddy ever. We both felt so proud in that moment and stayed in the bathroom for a while laughing and giggling, and photographing the stick! Then we lay on the bed together and prayed: thanking God for this tremendous blessing.
At the first scan we were overwhelemed to see there was a teeny tiny little person inside me! A little creation of 8 and a half weeks old, with head, body, the tiniest legs and arms! I exclaimed: ‘Wow! There is a little peanut inside me!’ For a few weeks the name peanut stuck as an affectionate term for the little person, and I enjoyed knowing little peanut was there. When my family visited it was with so much joy that we were able to announce to both our families of our happy news. We laughed and cried happy tears and hugged each other tight. We laughed that Hannah (a few months more pregnant than me), had a coconut, and I had a peanut 🙂
As the weeks have gone on I have been amazed by the whole experience. It feels like a mysterious magical experience, knowing something incredible is happening right inside my stomach. I stand in awe at my Creator God for dreaming up this invention of love creating life, and of the ongoing circle of life we live in. I am amazed, and my eyes tear up in thinking that God knows the little life inside my tummy already: inside out, back to front. He knows the character and the heart of this little soul, he knows the colour of the eyes and the shape of the fingerprints.
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb, I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made”
And he loves this little unborn life, with more love than I could ever muster in my human heart. And I stand in awe. I am continuously thankful for the little life we have not yet met, but who is known and loved already. I wrote a letter to our little fearfully and wonderfully made creation not too long ago.
Then, we woke up one morning just last week and something beautiful happened. I had my hand on my stomach and I felt a little movement, and waited, then i felt another. “Elikem,” I whispered excitedly, “I think our baby just moved and I can feel it! Come and feel.” Elikem’s eyes lit up with happy sparkles and he rolled towards me and gathered me in his arms, putting his hand on my stomach. We both waited, and then felt another wiggle! Elikem’s eyes beamed and sparkled more. He smiled from ear to ear and kissed me. “Our baby,” he whispered.
I have been describing this magical feeling of the baby moving feeling like I have popcorn in my tummy. Its the best way I can put it into words! My dear friend Tor laughed and told me that was an epic legend Becci-ism! It made me laugh too! It is ironic as I also adore popcorn!!
I smile too at the thought that I am so amazed by a movement. I am not saying “Wow, you can ride a bike! Or you got an ‘A’!” No, I am simply amazed by its little existence, saying, “Wow! You are here! You are alive! You can move!” And now in eager anticipation we wait to find out if the little creation, the little unseen loved one, is a girl or a boy. I have written this post before knowing, and I am on the edge of my seat waiting to find out….!!
And now I can joyfully announce… She is a little girl! Our joy in knowing has been incredible. I cried the whole way home from the doctor’s appointment, tears of deep joy in knowing more about this little life we have yet to meet. I lift my hands to heaven in thanks for the huge blessing He has given us.