As I learn day by day how to love Elikem well and as I experience his love for me, I learn about marriage. And I find that it is in the sacrifice, in the loving when it is not easy, in the laying down of feelings to put the other first that really counts. To love well is in the giving when it costs. This is where love grows strong and day by day, where it matters most. It is sometimes in big things, but often in the small small every day things. Sometimes I know Elikem has made a sacrifice to love me when he leaves what he is doing to seek me out in the house, simply to find out how I am, sitting his body next to me, his face turned to me, love in his eyes, the weight of his attention, his world, here with me.
Today I am thankful for him. He leaves early, before I rise, and I watch him go, my heart full of pride. He works hard and comes home late, his mind reeling from another day. It’s late, the amber sun has set in the hazy sky and the tropical air is cooling. But as I open up piles of freshly ironed sheets and wrestle them onto the bed, he comes into the room and quietly stretches out the flat sheet over the naked mattress. “Let me help you,” he whispers. I protest, insisting he sits down and rests, but he protests further, his love for me shining through cotton pillow cases.